Lyfes Lyrics

My Lyfestyle Through Lyrics

The Worst…

“But I want you…” – Jhene Aoki

In a timespan of a little over 2 months my life has changed quite drastically… in a great way! Yes… there are some things that I never thought I’d let go and there are some things I never thought I’d ever invite back into my life. One can say my life has come full circle.

After a few years of some of the toughest years of my life, I’m grateful to still be standing. And although there’s still a rough road ahead, I’m happy to know that I can see the light at the end of the tunnel. Life wouldn’t be life it was easy, right?

I’ve learned that letting go of something and someone can be more of a blessing than holding on. The worst isn’t yet over, but at least I’ve weathered some of the storm. What I’m most looking forward to are the days I spend with a friend upstate. Friends… that’s what we’ve agreed we are, but the more time I spend with him, there’s that inkling of hope and angst that we become more than just that. Are things better left unspoken? For now, yes. There’s more of a different part of this current chapter with which I have to deal before I end that specific part of the chapter. Once it’s ended, I’d like time to let reality sink in before I jump up and get back to starting a new book, so to speak. A great part of the next book I begin will definitely involve my “friend”. Don’t mind me. I’m beginning to speak in metaphors. I do that often when I can’t find the right words to plainly say what I want to express.

The worst… it’s far from over but knowing that there’s someone who cares enough to ask, who cares enough to listen to my reply to his questions, who cares enough to hold me when no one else realizes that I want badly to be held, who talks to me with a level of respect and honesty that I’ve been longing for from someone, who gently kisses me not realizing that my entire body breaths a sigh of relief but only yearns for more than just his kisses, who is comfortable being himself around me and in genuine return, I’m able to be the same when around him. I enjoy that. I respect that. I respect him for being unique and special. However, what I love the most about “him”, other than the fact that he’s a whole half foot taller than me, is that he’s the epitome of a true gentleman. There are times I’m left speechless because gentleman-like behavior is a rarity. I’m left speechless at times because as headstrong, stubborn and independent as I am, his demeanor demands reverence and humility. I do my best to show him that I’m accepting and receiving of any advice and warmth he shares with me.

Rather than focus on “the worst” and what I’ve endured, I’ve been making a better effort towards expecting “the best”, wanting “the best” and accepting only “the best”. I don’t think my “friend” realizes just how much I consider him to be the best. Whether he thinks he’s the best or not, I certainly love him the way he is, so he’s “my best” in terms of what I prefer. Time will only tell. They say that “the best is yet to come”. The best has already arrived… we’ll see how long it takes for him to realize that fact if he hasn’t already recognized that.

“the darkest moments in life often give us the most clarity.”

Until next time,

Lia aka LyfesLyrics

The Worst as performed by Jhene Aiko

[Verse 1]
Tell me whatcha say now?
Tell me whatcha say
Come again?
If you cannot stay down
Then you do not have to pretend
Like there is no way out
I shoulda never let you in
Cause you got me face down

[Bridge 1]
And don’t take this personal
But you’re the worst
You know what you’ve done to me
And although it hurts I know
I just can’t keep runnin’ away

I don’t need you (x4)
But I want you
I don’t mean to (x4)
But I love you

[Verse 2]
Tell me whatcha say now
Tell me whatcha say?
You said that you would come again
You said that we would remain friends but
You know that I do not depend on
Nothing or no one
So why would you show up
So uninvited then
Just change my mind like that

[Bridge 2]
Please don’t take this personal
But you ain’t shit
And you weren’t special
Til I made you so
You better act like you know
That I’ve been through worse than you
I just can’t keep runnin’ away


[Verse 3]
Everybody’s like, he’s no item
Please don’t like em
He don’t wife em
He one nights em
I never listen, no
I should have figured though
All that shit you was spittin’, so unoriginal
But it was you, so I was with it
And tell you the truth, wish we never did it
Cause I usually do stick to the business
But you came out the blue and then you just flipped it
God damn baby, my mind’s blown
I be forgettin’ you live in a different time zone
I think I know what this is
It’s just the time’s wrong
And yea I know what you did
But baby I’m grown
And my love is patient
And kind, and shit
If this is real we can build
Through different types of shit
If you was really the realest
Wouldn’t be fightin’ it
I think your pride is just

[Bridge 3]
In the way
Funny how everything changed
Once you got all that you wanted
Nothing was ever the same

I don’t need you (x4)
I still want you
I don’t mean to (x4)
But I, but I love you
I don’t need you (x4)
But I want you
I don’t mean to (x4)
But I love you


One comment on “The Worst…

  1. iiamvonnie
    April 8, 2014

    Reblogged this on shehasastoryy.


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Super excited for @pttheshaq senior season of #trackandfield! I truly appreciate your work ethic and determination to go out with a bang this year! Thank you for continuing to work through our sessions! #atn #aretethrowsnation #fieldnation #tracknation #thrownation #coach #athlete #blessing Everyone... meet DeSean. Every day in throw practice with my boys @hfvikingsthrows DeSean is humming, going through vocal warm ups or dancing. He missed practice last week for a recital. It crossed my mind after yesterday’s track meet to ask him how it went. He sent me a snippet of his recital where he covered @samsmithworld - Lay Me Down. (one of my favorites!) Music is such a huge part of my life; always has been and always will be. I don’t share that side of myself with my athletes only because for the 2 hours I’m with them, it’s all about throws. 
In a few weeks he moves on to perform again. I’m excited for him! Just because I’m his throw coach, doesn’t mean I don’t support and encourage my throwers other talents and gifts. Congratulations @deseancarey!

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