My Lyfestyle Through Lyrics
[#ipodonrepeat – If You Love Me – Brownstone]
If you have this song in your music library, please put it on. If you don’t, click on the title above and listen along while you read. It’s the acapella version of the song. I want you to REALLY listen to the lyrics. This song is a classic for a reason. It’s a timeless classic, because regardless of how old the song is, the lyrics and message are relatable. I’ve quoted each stanza of the song between paragraphs as I discuss those specific lyrics. Yes people, this is the topic of discussion for this post. Listen up!
I’m learning that my twitter followers read my blog. I started this blog for myself, as a means to vent and talk about my own emotions and feelings. But I’m learning that my readers find what I’m going through and what I share with them in my blog are experiences of which they can relate.
Since I’ve been on twitter, I’ve recognized that I’ve been retweeting what others are going through in their relationships, or at least have gone through in past relationships. And as much as we all love those wonderful, touchy, feely, fuzzy love quotes, we all have those days where we want to vent about the frustrations of feeling unappreciated, neglected and even taken for granted. I’ve seen these kind of tweets a lot lately. I’ve fallen victim to retweeting them myself because they’re relatable.
“I don’t wanna rain on this parade
But I’m starting to question the love that was made
I’m not looking for just an affair
Wanna love that is based on
truth not just dare”
The first stanza of the song says it all. “I don’t wanna rain on this parade”. No one likes a Debbie Downer, but we all have those moments when we want to scream at the top of our lungs the frustrations we are feeling emotionally. With a social network like twitter, we use our timelines to vent. I don’t mind it at all because I’ve done it before.
It’s hard in the beginning stages of a relationship to understand how one another communicates or expresses their feelings. For me, people can read my blog and know exactly what I’m going through (lol). But for others, writing isn’t their strong suit and sometimes taking the risk to begin a relationship or begin loving is hard.
Once a relationship is officially exclusive, a couple struggles with understanding one another. The lines of communication often get crossed. We want a relationship “based on truth not just dare”. I always tell people that a risk regretted is the risk not taken. When speaking of love, that’s definitely a difficult step to take. The more truth that exists in the beginning stages of a relationship, the more truth exists the duration of the relationship.
“You’ll not hurt my pride if right now you decide
That you are not ready to settle down
But if you want my heart then it’s time that you start
To act like you’re mine in the light and the dark”
Rejection is the initial reason why people don’t take a risk on love. Sometimes low self-esteem and other factors play a role in people not taking a risk. However, when in the courtship stage, it’s tough for a couple to read each other’s emotions. Long distance relationships are even more difficult. When texts, calls, emails and social networks are the only form of contact couples have in a relationship as a form of communication, it’s EXTREMELY tough to know what each person is feeling and/or thinking if they don’t actually communicate with exact words. I’ve used silence as a form of communication because sometimes, silence is all that’s needed. I don’t like to hurt the one I love, it just hurts when I feel like my efforts of affection aren’t being reciprocated. This too is something I’ve seen on my twitter timeline, and I most certainly am one of the people that retweets or replies back to those kind of tweets.
The courtship stage is the toughest stage to get past; aside from the boyfriend-girlfriend to fiancee stage. It’s hard to distinguish exactly when a couple wants to step out in public and let everyone know, WE’RE A COUPLE. The lyric “To act like you’re mine in the light and the dark” speaks to that exact feeling. For females, this emotion is all too familiar. All we want is to be acknowledged. It doesn’t have to be with the whole world, but at least some validation with friends. Because once there’s validation with a guy’s friends, then we can finally tell other interested parties “NO I GOT A MAN!”. But as long as there’s no validation or acknowledgement, we females will be confused with why our “boos” get mad and even avoid calling or texting us.
“You see now actions speak louder than words
So don’t just say things that I’ve already heard
Don’t want your body without your soul
I don’t want a love who will come here and go”
It sounds so cliche to say “actions speak louder than words”, but the statement is well known for a reason. ACTIONS DO SPEAK LOUDER THAN WORDS! Be it flowers, a card, a dinner, a spontaneous visit on a lunch hour, people really need to practice what they preach if they believe in this quote. Make the effort to show your love in different ways. I’m not just speaking to the men reading this post, but women as well. Men deserve to be spoiled too! Ladies, give him what he wants and desires and in return, he’ll give you what you want, need and then some.
Men, there’s one thing about every woman you MUST know about. We “don’t want your body without your soul”. Well, some women do, but the REAL ones that want an actual relationship and are willing to take a risk on love DON’T!
” If you love me say it
If you trust me do it
If you want me show it
If you need me prove it”
Do I really need to explain the message of the chorus of this song? It’s pretty self explanatory, don’t you think? From a woman’s perspective, these lyrics alone are all women want from a man. I understand that society already places enough pressure on our men to fulfill their roles in the workplace and other aspects of their lives outside of their role as a lover and friend. But if men did their best to “say it, do it, show it and prove it“, we women wouldn’t feel so unappreciated, neglected and being taken for granted. Ok, so I know I keep talking to my male readers as if I’m addressing you specifically, but understand that I do realize there are women who need to be told to reciprocate what the thoughtful men out there do for their women. I know of a few good men being dogged out by women; I hope those women get their acts together as much as I hope men who dog out women get their acts together.
Whatever the case may be, people courting someone need to open the lines of communication. It’s a waste of time making assumptions and implications when all that needs to be done is using the tools available as communicative tools to express our emotions and feelings. COMMUNICATE PEOPLE! Otherwise, leave the person alone!
Are you communicating well with the one you’re courting? What tools have you used to communicate better with your lover? Are you saying what you’re feeling, or do you expect him/her to read your damn mind? Has this post helped open your eyes to what you could be doing better in your relationship?
Until next post,