My Lyfestyle Through Lyrics
For the most part, I’m always bubbly. I’m always making someone laugh, smile, dance and even sing. Today, I wasn’t feeling like I wanted to do any of these things. I flipped on my ipod and the first song that came on was Adele’s song titled Take It All. This was EXACTLY what I was feeling. Thank you ipod for reading my mind when even my damn ex struggled to do even that! lol
There are, LITERALLY, a handful of people that know my life, know what I am going through here on the other side of the country. It seems like I’m on another planet in another universe most days. I disguise it pretty well, at least I think I do.
In my last relationship, I gave it my all. I feel like I gave it my all anyways. When I left, I told him to take it all, just take everything and leave me not a “mutha fucking” thing. I wasn’t bitter. I still am not bitter. But the funny thing is, he happily took it all as if the years we were together and the child I bore didn’t mean shit to him. But you know what? That day was a blessing in disguise. I realize now that I needed to endure that trial and tribulation in my life to get to where I am now.
I can now freely think what I want to think, do what I want to do, go where I want to go, be me and not feel like I have to filter what I say and do because someone else is afraid of how others will perceive him or me or even us.
I’ve distanced myself from my family because this is my life. It’s my drama. The last thing I want is to burden my loving parents with how free I feel now that I’ve moved forward with my life.
This is my crazy so called life. I don’t search for approval from anyone but God. I know I have a ways to go to be and feel closer to God. I recognize that. I’m grateful for the good, the bad and the ugly. I’m leaving it all in His hands now. I’ve told my ex to take it all with my love, when I now realize that’s what God was expecting me to tell Him. I know that now.
Are you willing to let go? How much of your life are you willing to let go? What are you not willing to let go? Can and have you told someone to take everything with your love? Are you ready to move on so that you can feel free once again?