My Lyfestyle Through Lyrics
Too bad this date was nothing like the movie Love & Basketball.
I was ecstatic that I was going on this last date. Not because of the person and the experience, but more so because I wanted it to be over. My first few blind dates in a time span of one week and I was already talking about becoming a nun. I’ll admit, Date 1 was the best experience thus far, but I am absolutely glad he was the first date and not the last. Can you imagine? I would’ve called J (Date 1) and told him don’t bother coming had Dates 1, 2 and 3. Then I really would’ve blocked my blessing and wouldn’t have had the best blind date ever.
All this built up anxiety about what this fourth date would turn out to be like was nauseating. How could he even compare to J? Would he be worst than Dates 2 and 3? CALGON TAKE ME AWAY… PLEASE?! *sigh*
As I was getting ready for date 4, tweeting and texting my homegirls and friends, I was doing what most women do: complaining I had nothing to wear while trying on everything I packed from home. Fortunately, date 4 contacted me and confirmed our date was still a go, but instead of dinner and dessert he suggested we play a few pick up games and then have dessert. Yes! *double fist pumps* Sports and dessert, my favorites! One problem: my personality is far from pleasing when I play basketball. I’m EXTREMELY competitive, and when I play basketball I talk more shit than Charles Barkley (but I back whatever I say up).
I threw on my shorts, tank, sneakers and headed out to jump in the car with Alfred (aka Batman’s Homeboy aka my mentor’s driver aka Sid). Upon arriving at the gym I, again, was mentally saying positive affirmations to myself hoping and praying for a fun night. Too bad… it didn’t pan out so positive. Actually, let me correct that, it was
positive for me in the sense that I won,
but not so positive in the sense that my date’s team lost against my team and he showed out the duration of the “date”.
Playing any game (i.e. – Monopoly, Life, SkipBo or 5,000 (a tongan card game
played similarly like Gin Rummy) or sport (i.e. – Tennis, Racquetball or one on one basketball) with a date is a good way to find out what they’re REALLY like as a person.Wwhether they play fair, how they make decisions, do they abide by the rules of the game or bend them to better their chances of winning, etc, it’s a great way to analyze a person’s true self. These few hours playing ball with my date showed me QUITE a bit about who he REALLY is as a person.
I thought I was mouthy on the court, but boy did he take the cake… and the frosting… and the cherry! He wasn’t even all that good, unless he was having an off day. It’s one thing to talk trash and back it up, it’s another to talk all that mess and not back up what you’re saying with actions. Talk the talk and walk the walk. He failed miserably and was trying to hard to impress me with his gameless game.
– Show Boating
Like I said, he talked the talk and couldn’t walk the walk. It only made him look stupid. Humility goes a long way with me, and he lacked it. Why bother boasting if there’s nothing there to prove your words are true? False advertisement! *refree whistle blown* TAUNTING PENALTY! 15 yards! Get off the field.
Women with attitude is normal, but men with attitudes is not a sexy look. My date started getting an attitude because his team was losing against mine. If anyone should’ve had an attitude it should’ve been me. I was on the “skins” team (in the summer men distinguish teams with one team wearing shirts and the other team NOT wearing shirts). Fortunately, I work out, do 1100 abs every evening and am comfortable with playing with just my sports bra on. I’m use to it. My comfortability didn’t faze the men either. I’m use to that as well, but my “date’s” attitude was getting on my last nerve. So much so that I had to “school” him a couple times to give him a better reason to have an attitude (accompanied with some trash talk after a couple “and one’s” and “swishes” in the face).
– Cheater, Cheater, Pumpkin Eater
As if the previous pet peeves with this date weren’t enough, he was now trying to cheat his way to a win. Calling fouls that weren’t fouls, calling travel when the player did not a travel, acting like he forgot the score when everyone else knew how many baskets each person made (funny math on the basketball court pisses me off) and acting “Hollywood” when he actually did get fouled. Come on buddy! Really?! Play by the rules and play fair! He is morally and ethically challenged. Get off the court already!
– Poor sportsman-like conduct
All that and then some! He lacked everything a great athlete should embody. Humility, poise, modesty, integrity, truth… need I say more? He didn’t even shake hands with my team and then… just when I think all things he had done on the court couldn’t get any worse… he talked AT me in a tone of voice that was like someone scratching a chalkboard surface. I was saying bye to the men on both my team and the other team, sitting on the bench chit chatting and date 4 says in a condescending voice: You about ready? I am. Let’s go now! #hop (hold on playa) #recordscratchmoment #pumpyourbreaks (My mentor wouldn’t be happy with how I replied, but she would also be equally or more furious with this date and how poorly he conveyed himself on the court as well as his tone of voice he took with me). WARNING: profane language coming up in 5… 4… 3… 2… 1… 0…
“M**** F****, who you think you talkin to? I ain’t yo woman and even if I was you wouldn’t be damn sure talkin to me like that. F*** YOU! there’s your dessert! Bye!”
I know, I’m cringing as I write what I said. Maybe I should’ve conducted myself in a more of lady-like manner, but I have a mouth of a sailor and it’s EXTREMELY worse on the basketball court. But can you blame me? Oh well… judge me or not, it came out. Sorry. Have I mentioned I’m Polynesian? (lol)
All in all, about the only positive things that came out of this date were:
a) I saw the ugly in him (date 4)
b) I got a good workout in
c) my team won 4 out of 7 (it was suppose to be the best 2 out of 3 but my date was trying to win so he talked his team into running it back again) smh
d) I served a new kind of dessert that night (or not; if you want to call it Humble Pie)
Thank God this was the last date! I don’t think I want to do blind dates again, but then again… if they’re anything like my first one, then I’ll stay with the opt in status. *shrugs*