Lyfes Lyrics

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Soldier (Date 3)


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[WARNING: This is going to be short because Date 3 was short (in more ways than one).]

This week of blind dates was starting to take a toll on me. A great first blind date made me open up and eventually led to me putting down my guard (see my post titled “MMM”). But a horrific second blind date, had me throw up my wall, put up my invisible force field and put on my bullet proof vest while holding onto my life saver (see my post titled “Not Unusual?). I needed to change some things or I’d be expecting some bullshit on my last two dates.

My first two dates were dinner dates, so I decided to change the meal time of my third. Instead of a dinner date, I wanted a lunch date. So I informed my date that lunch would be a better time for me instead of dinner, luckily he agreed to make that change. I didn’t want my last few nights to in this town to be ruined by wasted time with dates that weren’t worth my time. I feel a little bad because I had all these thoughts running through my head while getting ready and I know better than to think negative thoughts. What I think is what happens. I took quite a few “woosaaah” moments throughout the day to try and keep myself in a positive state of mind, but it didn’t seem like it had worked.

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As I was headed to the bistro down the street, I kept repeating positive affirmations in my mind trying to be open about this next date. Like always, my brain was elsewhere thinking about other things (I get very easily distracted). I took a seat and waited… and waited… and waited. I began tweeting my frustrations because being tardy on a date is one thing, but after a half hour? Come on men and women! Be on time (please and thank you)! Each time I tweeted I continued to look up occasionally to see whether my date was in sight. Nope (“not a nan nutta”)! I continued tweeting until I looked up again and saw a gentleman (I’m being nice by calling him a gentleman because he was dressed like a stereotypical “thug”). Gold chains, saggy jeans, pinky ring, fitted hat and two watches on each wrist (need I decribe more?) All that I was thinking was “Lord please! If he’s my date please let him at least be a gentleman!” As he looked around he kept glancing at me, but because I wore sunglasses he really couldn’t gain eye contact with me. (The song that came to mind that best describes him would be Destiny’s Child’s thug anthem featuring T.I.: SOLDIER). I tweeted a few more times, then looked up and slowly raised my sunglasses to sit them on top of my head. I pushed his chair out from the table and patted on the seat as a gesture for him to have a seat. He quickly rushed over and I stood up to greet him but he gave me one of those “homeboy” handshakes with the pat on the back with the other hand (pet peeve alert!). Who does that? Who greets a woman like a homeboy sitting on the stoop? Thank God this was a lunch date because I knew I was going to end this quicker than I ended my second blind date.

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We conversed about really mundane, rudimentary and pretty basic topics. And after a 10 minutes, he started sounding like the adults in the Charlie Brown cartoons (wah wah wah wah wah wah wah). And within 30 minutes into the date, after hearing his goals and aspirations in life, I had to let him know that he was far from the type of guy I was interested in and that I don’t think this would even work out. He agreed. He could read it in my body language. I graciously thanked him for his time and wished him the best in all his endeavors as he pursues his dreams of being a rapper. (Was that a bit harsh of me? I hope not.)

I headed back up to the flat but came across a restaurant that had a beautiful vestibule. I couldn’t resist. I’m obsessed with foyers, vestibules and small rooms with great acoustics. I love singing in these small places. I scurried into the vestibule and stood there people watching while singing some of my favorite songs: Aaliyah – At Your Best, Brandy – Have You Ever, En Vogue – Giving Him Something He Can Feel. I felt much better after my mini vocal
session. Then I headed home.

Just as easily as it takes for something as small as an uninteresting conversation to throw me off track, it took music to bring me back on track. Music has always done that for me and always will.

I’ve learned a lot of valuable lessons about myself this last week.

1) My tolerance for bulshit has gotten smaller than it already was.

2) I CAN be open to new things as long as I feel it’s beig reciprocated (Date 1 was evidence of this).

3) I am more bold and cold-blooded than I thought I was (Date 2 and 3 were proof of this).

4) I am still warm, caring, hospitable and considerate at my core (the wax party and overnight guests proves this).

5) My sanity is still in tact (I’m being nice to myself because I have crazy tendencies).

All this self analytical talk going on in my head tells me I’m human. I’m grateful for these moments and these dates because of the life lessons and experiences I gain. I just need to talk to my mentor about how she went about choosing date 2 and 3 because they both were EXTREMELY not my cup of tea. I want to know who recommended them. Is she testing me? I think she is!

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This entry was posted on August 1, 2011 by in Adventures, Experience, Food, Friends, Love, Relationships, Social and tagged , , , , , .
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